Voyeur

Jack watched the black and white screen in front of him, and had to remind himself to breath. Anyone watching the TV with him, would wonder what was so interesting about the scene, but even had they asked Jack wouldn't have told them. It was too hard to explain why the sight of an innocuous blue box, sitting in the middle of the Plaza right above Torchwood, caused him to feel so much emotion. The wound was still raw, even after so long.

The Doctor was in Cardiff. So was Rose. It took everything in him to remain hidden in Torchwood Three; to not go searching for them and demand entrance back into their lives. The problem was, he was here, too. His past self was walking around with the Doctor and Rose, having the time of his life, unaware that just a few days later everything would change.

The feeling wasn't unfamiliar in the least. He'd been anxious and on edge for the past few months, ever since Margaret the Slitheen was elected mayor. He'd recognized her instantly, but knew there was nothing he could do about the nuclear plant she'd proposed.

Time was a delicate thing. His history had to repeat itself, or he may never arrive at this point in time.

It didn't stop him from wanting to seek out his friends the instant he'd seen the TARDIS sitting in the Plaza above. He'd been waiting for what seemed like an eternity for the TARDIS to plot down in Cardiff to refuel on the Rift. But he'd already risked too much by spying on them at the restaurant and getting caught by the Doctor.

He also remembered what was coming, and had sent the rest of the team off on a wild goose chase in the countryside. He doubted they'd stay away once the earth started to shake and the Rift became active, but he'd deal with that later. He'd just needed to get them out of Cardiff and away from Torchwood, in case any of them ran into his past self wandering around town.

...any minute now....

There it was. The TARDIS had connected to the Rift, opening it up as it sucked in massive amounts of energy. The entire town shook as the Rift was slowly ripped apart, and it was only by sheer determination that Jack kept his seat, focusing all his attention on the still-functional screen. He watched as first the Doctor and Margaret the Slitheen ran into the TARDIS, followed by Rose a short time later. His memory filled in the unseen, recalling how Rose had been held hostage by a Slitheen 'hand', how the extrapolator had been a Trojan horse, hijacking the TARDIS until the TARDIS had fought back.

Then everything stopped. No more energy flowing between the TARDIS and the Rift, no more earthquakes and no more danger of the Rift being torn open.

He watched as Rose left the TARDIS again, only to return a short time later in tears. All the while he ignored the incessant ringing of his phone.

Later. He'd talk to all the government and public officials, later. Right now, he needed to watch. Watch as the TARDIS faded out of his view, and out of his life.

Even though he knew he couldn't have done anything without risking a paradox of epic proportions, Jack still felt a sense of loss once the TARDIS had gone. He felt as if he'd let the chance of a lifetime slip through his fingers; a chance that would never repeat itself.

But it would, that much he knew. He would meet up with the Doctor once again.

He had to.

END

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